More than roses

Two weeks until prom! It sounds dumb coming from a homeschooler, I know. And no, I am not having prom in my living room. Every year, the homeschool group in Tricities puts on a Prom for the teens.

This will be my third year attending the spring dance, but it won't feel as fun this time. The past two years, my friend Gabbie and I have danced our socks off together. But this year, Gabbie is moving to Idaho, and she will be busy that night with something else. Even worse, the night of the dance is the night before she leaves. I was super bummed, but Gabbie encouraged me to go to the dance without her because I had already made previous commitments to go. I will miss Gabbie's beautiful face, but I think everything’s going to work out. At least I hope so!

                                         Homeschool Prom 2012
                   Top (l to r): James, Gabbie, Lizzy M, me, Lizzy A, Danny, Noah
                   Bottom (l to r): Zach, Joe, Rachel
                   (there were probably at least 100 more teens at the dance, including
                    several other friends who, sadly, weren't in the picture)

High school prom can be the best time of your life. Or the worst. Some people look back on high school dances and recall the wonderful memories with friends, smiling at the cute dress and shoe choices. Others look at photos and shudder, exclaiming how "I can't believe I did my hair like that" or wondering "Why did I go with that guy I didn't even like?"

Fortunately for me, I've never had to deal with "going with guys I don't like" because, frankly, most homeschoolers in Tricities won't date. Not even for prom. Rather, a group of guys and girls will usually meet for dinner beforehand, then head over to the dance.

Even though no one "officially" takes a date to the prom, it doesn't mean there aren't some of those who single out the person they like... You know the type. They aren't allowed to date, so they go in a group and then spend excessive amounts of time together. Sometimes you just want to shout, "Just sit at your own table, you lovebirds!" But these people are your friends, so you don't ;)

Yes, I admit it. I make fun of twitterpated people, as you can see from my last post. I get the biggest kick out of googley-eyed, drooling couples. People in love are so oblivious. Why not make the most of their absent-mindedness? Needless to say, my friends and siblings put up with a lot of teasing from me.

Philip tells me he can't wait until I get a boyfriend. I smugly assure him that I'll never act so head-over-heels as him and Steph do. But they both just laugh at me and tell me one day, I'll understand. Then they can get back at me for all the times I posted cheesy pictures of them on my blog.

Oh, I get my share of teasing too. But no one ever knows if they've got it right... I'm very reserved about my feelings, so nobody can tease me too bad because they can never figure out what's going through my head.

It's all funny now, but what about when it's actually time to get serious? When I open myself up to being in a relationship, it's not going to be a joke. When I fall in love for the first time, I think I will be scared to death. And I don't want people poking fun at that.

But so far, I haven't met that special someone, even though I've been prodded to "go get a boyfriend", and specifically told "a great place to find guys is at the mall". It used to bother me to spend Valentine's day, proms and dances without a guy. But I would rather be alone than do the dumb dating thing. When I give my heart away, it's going to be for real. And my love is going to last way after the prom.

A great example to me of true love is my cousin April and her husband Jon. April just had twins five months ago. The couple spent weeks in the hospital because the girls were a month premature. In the middle of the night, April gets up to feed and soothe whenever they cry. Jon helps as much as he can until he goes to work and then when he comes home after work.Those two feed, change, bounce, and cuddle those girls without relenting. Throughout the exhaustion and frustration of parenting, the love radiating through them is unbelievable. April homeschools her three other children and manages the whole household, while still comforting kindly and keeping all the kids in line. That kind of sacrifice radiates true love.

When you sign up for marriage it is NOT bubbles and dandelions. It's planning a wedding with dramatic extended family. It's raising children together- snot, diapers, tears, late nights. It's intimacy, trust, going through trials together. Real love is not neat and tidy. But it's rewarding.

That's why I won't have any high school dating, not even for the prom. Because the boys my age are not capable of the kind of love I'm looking for in a relationship. And it's unrealistic to expect it from them, especially at such a young age. So until us teens are at a maturity that we can understand true love, I don't think it's wise to enter into a relationship. Because I believe love is more than roses.

Love is dying on a Cross.

"He could give me diamonds, but You're the treasure that I seek. He could whisper sweet nothings, but You're the voice in my dreams. He could sing me a song, but You're the melody. He could give me a home, but You're my safety. He could give me roses, but You're the earth, the rain, the Son. He could kiss me softly, but You're the maker of Love. He could give me his heart, but You're the beat in mine. He could lay down beside me, but You laid down You're life. Nothing compares to You." 

Danielle Rose