Keeping tidy

A few days ago, I decided to do the dreaded task of cleaning my room. My bedroom was a complete mess- I had clothes scattered everywhere, sewing supplies strewn about, and random papers sitting on my dresser. All the items I had used in the past several weeks had accumulated into one humongous pile of messy. My disorganization was not only apparent on my floor, but on my dresser, in my drawers, closet, and even my purse.

To illustrate the dire condition of my room, I've posted a picture below.

 

The top of my dresser was piled with clothes. My garbage hadn't

been dumped in weeks, and my closet (which you can't see very 

well because of the guitar) was full of stuff. 

I know what you're thinking... "Wow, Dani, that is kind-of sick. Like, why are you sharing with us a gross visual of your cooties? Eww... What insight is this blog post giving me besides the fact that we are all grateful that we're not your roomate?"

Well, I wanted to share because once my room gets to a point of dirtiness, it is a real struggle for me to muster up enough energy to really clean (not just stuff everything in my top drawer). I know I have overcome a major obsticale when I clean my room start to finish. Halfway through, I am tempted to give up because the work of sorting through everything is just so grueling. Sometimes, I just look at the mess and feel hopless and desperate. But in the end, when my work is complete, I can rest knowing that I have accomplished something that seemed impossible.

The way I feel about cleaning my room deeply reflects my outlook on my emotional "deep cleans". I often find myself stashing up hurt and pain in my heart, and before I know whats happened, I've accumulated a big mess of fear, stress, and heartache. I look into my heart and realize what a big project it would be to clean my heart out from all the mean words, accusations, and blame that I've held onto. I look at the mess I'm in. It seems impossible to get out of, so I just try to hide it, pretend it's not there. But the mess just gets bigger and bigger, which makes it harder and harder to hide.

After a certain point, I decide that I will take the challenge of doing the work because I know it would be more of a challenge to try to live with my piles of pain hindering. It looks impossible. It feels impossible. And so many times, I am tempted to walk away from the grime that I didn't even realize was there. It seems hopless, like I'm not making any progress, like I'm stuck. And sometimes I am.

But thankfully for me, I can hold to the promise that "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." The narrow road is a hard one, but luckily, we don't have to walk it alone. I can just imagine Jesus carrying me when I feel so beaten down that I can't even move another inch. He is holding me in His loving arms, reminding me that He is always there, even when I feel totally and completely alone.

Somehow in the end, everything works out perfectly. I know my emotional healing will always take upkeeping, just like my room. And I know that He always keeps my best interest in mind, because He knows what I need even more than I know what I need. I am so thankful to have the Holy Trinity here to guide me, lead me, provide for me, and strengthen me on those hard "cleaning days."

My CLEAN room!

Now it's time to clean out my bathroom... :)

Prom!

Anyone who knows me will tell you that I'm a dancer. While I can follow to east coast, lindy, tango etc., my true color shines in the hip hop scene. So naturally, I love to hit the dance floor. So when prom rolls around, I can hardly contain my excitment.

While dancing is a passion and favorite pastime of mine, getting excited for prom this year was a little rougher than years past... I was really struggling the few weeks leading up to prom- especially the night before, when everything just seemed to unravel. Tears and meltdowns made me about 2 centimeters away from giving up on the whole prom thing altogether. I was miserable, but had already commited to come to the dance.

My gracious mom prayed for me a lot. She knew that I would regret staying home from the dance. So she prayed and prayed and prayed that I would have a breakthrough in the next 24 hours leading up to the dance. She asked God to take care of me when I couldn't even ask Him myself.

I am in awe at how everything completely fell into place after that. Somehow by the time my sister's date came to pick us all up, I was ready and actually felt pretty good about myself. I'd consider that a miracle, taking into account my sour attitude before.

Prom ended up, as always, being AMAZING. I mean, what could be better than dancing for four hours straight? Especially when you are surrounded by awesome friends, clean music, and flashing cameras everywhere (ok, maybe the cameras aren't good... they always seem to capture those not-so-lovely moments :-). Fortunetly for me, we got several good pictures of me and our group of friends, although sadly, some of my other friends (aka Jacob, Eric, Ryan, Kim, and Gabbie) weren't available at the time we had them taken. Anyway, I've shared some of the nicer pics below, to give you a taste of what homeschool prom is like...

Me in my green dress. The theme this year was "Under the Sea."

Special thanks to Mom for the perfect corsage and Steph

for the stylin' hairdo:)

Me and Lizzy M.

She came over early so we could get ready together

The Danny Williams caravan :-)

Danny (in the back) and his lovely ladies:

(L to R) Lizzy A (aka Sis), me, Lizzy M and Keralynda

Danny took my sister to the dance as her "official" date, but he also

got a special package of three other girls riding along.

The girls

Lizzy M, Me, Keralynda, Lizzy A

A group of us got together beforehand at a park to get photos (L to R)

Zach C, Tabitha, Me, Kourtney, Lizzy A, Noah, Keralynda, Lizzy M

Danny, Rachel, Zach H

After such a wonderful experience, I praise my Dad in heaven for taking care of me. He provided everything I needed and more. He healed me do that I could fully enjoy myself with the people I love. Everything worked out wonderfully, and I am so thankful to have a Father who takes care of me so well.

This experience has reminded me (once again) to totally surrender everything. Because I know that there is Someone who sees the bigger picture and is just waiting for me to give it to Him.

He ALWAYS knows what's best. Thank you Jesus!

Making the most of life

My life is wild.

The weirdest, funniest, craziest things happen to me. Or at least I think so. Perhaps the real reason my life is so exciting is because it's filled with exciting people. When I'm around my family and friends, a completely ordinary and normal situation becomes the runner-up story for the next "Funniest Home Videos." If only we'd gotten it on tape!

For example, a few days ago, I stopped at a red light. Then I spot this guy in the right lane next to me who looked just like my old drive instructor. He was wearing sunglasses, so I couldn't really tell, but I got super excited, thinking, "I bet he's wondering why I'm driving without an adult." After the light turned green, I peered to get a second look. Can you guess? Totally the wrong person. In fact, this man (who I had no idea who he was) excitedly pulled out his phone and mouthed, "Can I have your phone number?" The look of horror that crossed my face surely spoke more than my vigorous shake of the head. Then, after he took his exit, he turned to me and did... the wave. You know it. Where you wiggle your fingers at somebody. The had gesture someone might do if they were saying toodles. Yes, I know. I have the heebilie-geebies just thinking about it. Although I have resolved for next time to just give him Philip's number.

The point is, I probably told that story six different times, each to the same group of people plus one. You know, for that ONE person who didn't hear the story. And every single time, we all died laughing. You'd think it would get old, but then again, my family loves to have a good time. Even if it means repeating the joke several times to watch everyones reaction.

I love my family and friends. But, we're crazy. Not in the "you are insane I need a restraining order" kind-of crazy, but the "you do things that no one had enough guts to do and we love you for it" kind-of crazy.

Just yesterday, all the girls in my family (plus one... nevermind, Gabbie you're family too :) went to My Fro Yo to get some delicious ice cream. It was a special night- it was the last sleepover Gabbie and I will have before she leaves for Idaho.

Since Gabbie is the kind-of person who fits in with us crazy Andersens so well, why not do something insane? I mean, it's our last sleepover! Come on!

Soooo. We did something crazy. Watch the video.

Me, Lizzy, Gabbie in our matching pj's dancing it up in the (mostly) empty

My Fro Yo. What we didn't know was that there were more costumers

on their way in while we were doing this- they came in at the end, but

with those huge windows, I don't doubt they saw the whole thing...

  

This video pretty much sums up the story of my life. Believe me, I've had my fair share of awful situations, broken hearts, and betrayal. There was a time when I wondered if I'd ever be happy. And sometimes it doesn't feel like life is giving me a joy ride. But God has put people in my life who remind me to find joy in the little things. My family encourages me every day, and they help me to be uplifting in what I say and do.

I have also been blessed with wonderful friends like Gabbie, who challenges me to live out my wild side, even when I want to sit in the store and cry while I'm picking out jewelry (true story!). She reminds me that I deserve to be respected and cherished, even when I feel like a pile of muck and want to beat up on myself.  She tells me daily that if "if anyone messes with my Dani, they better watch out." I know she's always got my back. And she's always willing to be crazy with me. Hence the dancing in My Fro Yo :D

Gabbie is moving in two days. The girl I met five years ago is so much different than the girl I know now. We have both grown up and matured (I guess the video doesn't really back that up, does it?) and become young women instead of girls. We understand the importance of friendship and would do anything for the other. We can tell a loser guy from a mile away, and will never cease to remind the other to wait on God's timing. Gabbie is a true friend. And I will miss her. She feels more like family and less like a friend.

But Gabbie- near, far, wherever you are, I believe our frienship will go on :) Cottonwood, here I come! 

"The roads to a friend's house are never long." Danish Proverb*

*I'm not Danish, but what the heck :) I like the quote*